Thursday, 9 January 2003
Whats in a name?
In game, I go by many names. But on the net, I'm known mainly by two names. Gayebyker and Spelk. Gayebyker was a contentious name I adopted in homage to a band I thoroughly loved during the mid to late 80's. Gaye Bykers on Acid. A grebo band who were short-lived but long revered. My gayebyker name gets me into trouble still, people always need the explanation. It was primarily chosen for such a reaction, but after the many years I've used it on the net, I am tired of having to explain it. If people want to think I'm gay, and/or a biker then so be it. Anyway, I also took up the name Spelk partly to distance myself from gayebyker, partly to secure another web domain. Spelk is a North Eastern (in England) term used to describe a small splinter of wood annoyingly stuck in your finger. Slightly irritating, but fascinating to watch being extracted and revealed. There you have it.
Monday, 6 May 2002
Rogue Leader
After having snapped up the Cube. On launch day. I was most surprised to be swept up by Rogue leader. Although I anticipated a fairly good update to Rogue Sqaudron on the N64, I didn't reckon the game would give me what I craved when I was but a teenager living through the 70's when Star Wars come out. Anything I could ever want to do then, I can do now. It's like being given a ticket to explore your childhood fantasies.
The first mission being taking on the Deathstar. Complete with stunning visuals, Darth Vader giving you a buzz, and Han swooping in to save you for the last drop. It's been a long time in the coming. Not since the Star Wars coin op - has there been something this spectacular and close the experience I WANTED so much then. The original Rogue Squadron gave me a timid crack at such items as imperial probes and AT-AT's - but it never really gave me a go at the DeathStar! Since the graphics are spectacular, and tie fighters really are quite difficult to spot in formation against a starry background, I never truly understood the meaning of chaos. The Jedi games on the PS2, hint at anarchy, but give you the soft option of a targetting computer that truly locks onto a target and gives you a HUD display. Not so in RL. RL gives you the tie fighter, and the vacuum of space. Thats it. Admittedly, you have the orange neon dazzle of the flip in/flip out targetting computer. But that only stands as a mechanism by which to confirm the elusiveness of these Ties. A gimmick, if you will, but a functional one, without spoon feeding you the enemies.
Everything is polished, yet nothing is compromised in this game. You have ground troops fleeing or attacking on the planet Hoth, you have a multitude of advancing AT-AT's, yet you only have to take down three to complete the mission. Everything is detailed, and you get a feeling of familiarity - this is a place you've fought before. A place you've glimpsed in the film, and now you are in a Snowspeeder, flying between these walking nightmares legs. Relying on you swift of hand and the strength of your tow cable to take them down. The battle commands are delivered to you, wearily, yet clearly during combat. You have to take note, yet not deviate from your current task. Your wingmen provide adequate air-mates. You command then as you will, and sometimes they prove themselves.
The missions may get harder and more complex - without a save mid-mission - my only gripe. However, the chaotic combat and beautiful modelling and scenery will just suck you in and force you to become a pilot for the rebellion. Something you thought you give up a long, long time ago.
The force is strong with this one.
The first mission being taking on the Deathstar. Complete with stunning visuals, Darth Vader giving you a buzz, and Han swooping in to save you for the last drop. It's been a long time in the coming. Not since the Star Wars coin op - has there been something this spectacular and close the experience I WANTED so much then. The original Rogue Squadron gave me a timid crack at such items as imperial probes and AT-AT's - but it never really gave me a go at the DeathStar! Since the graphics are spectacular, and tie fighters really are quite difficult to spot in formation against a starry background, I never truly understood the meaning of chaos. The Jedi games on the PS2, hint at anarchy, but give you the soft option of a targetting computer that truly locks onto a target and gives you a HUD display. Not so in RL. RL gives you the tie fighter, and the vacuum of space. Thats it. Admittedly, you have the orange neon dazzle of the flip in/flip out targetting computer. But that only stands as a mechanism by which to confirm the elusiveness of these Ties. A gimmick, if you will, but a functional one, without spoon feeding you the enemies.
Everything is polished, yet nothing is compromised in this game. You have ground troops fleeing or attacking on the planet Hoth, you have a multitude of advancing AT-AT's, yet you only have to take down three to complete the mission. Everything is detailed, and you get a feeling of familiarity - this is a place you've fought before. A place you've glimpsed in the film, and now you are in a Snowspeeder, flying between these walking nightmares legs. Relying on you swift of hand and the strength of your tow cable to take them down. The battle commands are delivered to you, wearily, yet clearly during combat. You have to take note, yet not deviate from your current task. Your wingmen provide adequate air-mates. You command then as you will, and sometimes they prove themselves.
The missions may get harder and more complex - without a save mid-mission - my only gripe. However, the chaotic combat and beautiful modelling and scenery will just suck you in and force you to become a pilot for the rebellion. Something you thought you give up a long, long time ago.
The force is strong with this one.
Saturday, 4 May 2002
Cubed
I spent approximately one month rationalising over the Gamecube. I come to the decision that I would not buy one at launch. There weren't enough games on the little blighter to convince me it would be a worthwhile buy. I saw the price drop on the Xbox and the subsequent drop of the Cube to RRP of £129 and this got me tingling. Rogue Leader looked tempting, I'd been playing Rogue Sqaudron on my N64 a week or so earlier and the Stars Wars Episode II hype machine had just started to kick in... so I was being pumped by my childhood fascination with flying X-wings and Snowspeeders. I still couldn't justify the purchase now. I said to myself I'd wait till Pikmin was out. Foolishly I was talked into exploring Paper Mario on the N64 just a week ago and this foray into cutesy 'tendo role playing caught both me and my nipper on the hop. We loved it. Now I was being pumped by Nintendo's previous console and games to explore what the cube had to offer. Obviously Luigis Mansion could carry on the cute plumbing theme - and I now had the justification that my nipper would love it. Fatal. I can barely hold myself back when I'm on a roll, but get my nipper involved and we're like two schoolkids, except I've got a credit card! Anyway, the long and the short of it is that I knew I was going to buy a Cube sooner or later, and since I now had two games I fancied at launch and I'd taken the day off work on launch day - my fate was sealed. So I am now the proud owner of a batchelor pad Black Cube and I'm currently slinging my tow cable around an AT-AT's legs, and sucking ghostly visions into a vacuum cleaner. I am enjoying myself.
Monday, 22 April 2002
Shadow Hearts
Take a splash of FFVII, a splash of FFVIII and a dollop of Koudelka (I know most won't know what that is anyway) and you have Shadow Hearts. Its an RPG with a dark story, leaning more towards Horror and the Supernatural than anything else. Theres plenty of blood and evil goings on, in this steam-punk alternate world. You take the role of a rather brassy stereotypical japanese wise guy - who has an ability (named fusion) to shapeshift into a number of elemental monsters. He hears voices in his head, he is plagued by an ever increasing malice, that builds up to dangerous levels as he fights. If his Malice is allowed to reach critical (red) then the spirit of his fusion-capable father complete with scary fox-face mask comes down to taunt and battle him and generally kill him off. To quell the malice he has to enter a spiritual graveyard to do battle with monsters conjured by the four face mask keepers. If he wins his malice disipates for now. As he does battle in the 'real world' he also gathers soul points from his opponents depending on their elemental type - and as these level up - when they gain a level, he can battle an elemental monster at the graveyard and upon winning captures its soul allowing him to shapeshift into that beast, and adopt its special powers and attacks.
Our hero can only equip 3 monsters souls at any one time, so selection of souls is key to winning some battles. While all this is going on, you are following a quite complex story, and interesting characters roll in and roll out from time to time. The dialogue tends to be a bit camp at times, and there is an overtly teenage obsession with being fruity with the lead scantily clad japanese schoolgirl. It's amusing at times in that it just says things like 'You were staring at my breasts!' Over the top mostly, but expected.
The characters tend to have quite strong personalities and a good history behind them, some of the battling animations are downright slapstick - and that warms me to the game. One of my favourite characters is Margarete, a lovely lass in mini skirt, fishnet stockings and Dr Martin boots. She calls on her mobile for her special equipment, and from the sky it drops, maybe a grenade, a sniper rifle, a large pair of Elton John comedy spectacles or a toilet chain to flush. Shes a mean shot with a luger pistol also.
The battle system is turn based, like Final Fantasy, however they've added an arcade twist. In order to perform anything you have press the button in time with spinning arc on the Judgement Ring. In essence its like hitting the strike zones on any golf game. For different actions there are different numbers of zones, some are narrower and some (mainly the attack ones) have a red sub-zone which indicates a harder hit. Striking with a weapon, you can pull off a perfect if you land marker in the three red zones - and this is very satisfying. But taking the risk of a landing a perfect leaves you open to actually failing to make the attack at all. Even healing is judged by the ring, and also bargaining discounts on some equipment purchase. Some people have said that this distracts away from the basic fight, and labors every action you perform, however, I found it livened up the battles - keeping you focused - and giving you an amount of participation in the battle that previous turn based RPG games haven't had.
The graphics are ok, well done, but are not of PS2 quality. This game could easily have sat on a PSX - having said that, the characters and monsters are pleasingly large and some of the monsters are the oddest ones I've seen in a long time. Frogs with faces in their eyes and a hand for a tongue - backward facing ghouls whose heads rotate whilst attacking you with their what can only be described as very long penis! The shapeshifting beasts our hero can turn into are also lovingly crafted and are suitably different from each other. Spell and attack effects can be a little dull and simplistic but they are swiftly executed and keep the pace of the battle up.
The musical score is excellent!
Overall, I like Shadow Hearts. It gives a Final Fantasy style game with some interesting twists and a darker more horror based setting. There are not many FMV scenes, although there is a lovely ghost story told part way in the game that amused me no end. Schlop! Scholp! Schloop! It doesn't take itself too seriously, but it does give you a good story to participate in and some nice shapeshifting paranormal battles. Worth it, while you wait for FFX.
Our hero can only equip 3 monsters souls at any one time, so selection of souls is key to winning some battles. While all this is going on, you are following a quite complex story, and interesting characters roll in and roll out from time to time. The dialogue tends to be a bit camp at times, and there is an overtly teenage obsession with being fruity with the lead scantily clad japanese schoolgirl. It's amusing at times in that it just says things like 'You were staring at my breasts!' Over the top mostly, but expected.
The characters tend to have quite strong personalities and a good history behind them, some of the battling animations are downright slapstick - and that warms me to the game. One of my favourite characters is Margarete, a lovely lass in mini skirt, fishnet stockings and Dr Martin boots. She calls on her mobile for her special equipment, and from the sky it drops, maybe a grenade, a sniper rifle, a large pair of Elton John comedy spectacles or a toilet chain to flush. Shes a mean shot with a luger pistol also.
The battle system is turn based, like Final Fantasy, however they've added an arcade twist. In order to perform anything you have press the button in time with spinning arc on the Judgement Ring. In essence its like hitting the strike zones on any golf game. For different actions there are different numbers of zones, some are narrower and some (mainly the attack ones) have a red sub-zone which indicates a harder hit. Striking with a weapon, you can pull off a perfect if you land marker in the three red zones - and this is very satisfying. But taking the risk of a landing a perfect leaves you open to actually failing to make the attack at all. Even healing is judged by the ring, and also bargaining discounts on some equipment purchase. Some people have said that this distracts away from the basic fight, and labors every action you perform, however, I found it livened up the battles - keeping you focused - and giving you an amount of participation in the battle that previous turn based RPG games haven't had.
The graphics are ok, well done, but are not of PS2 quality. This game could easily have sat on a PSX - having said that, the characters and monsters are pleasingly large and some of the monsters are the oddest ones I've seen in a long time. Frogs with faces in their eyes and a hand for a tongue - backward facing ghouls whose heads rotate whilst attacking you with their what can only be described as very long penis! The shapeshifting beasts our hero can turn into are also lovingly crafted and are suitably different from each other. Spell and attack effects can be a little dull and simplistic but they are swiftly executed and keep the pace of the battle up.
The musical score is excellent!
Overall, I like Shadow Hearts. It gives a Final Fantasy style game with some interesting twists and a darker more horror based setting. There are not many FMV scenes, although there is a lovely ghost story told part way in the game that amused me no end. Schlop! Scholp! Schloop! It doesn't take itself too seriously, but it does give you a good story to participate in and some nice shapeshifting paranormal battles. Worth it, while you wait for FFX.
Dungeon Siege
A number of people I have spoken to have expressed their opinion that Dungeon Siege is boring and the problems with Multiplayer drag it down enough to give up on it.
I think DS has given action RPG'ers an engine to play out their fantasies. It's only been out over here a couple of days. Give it time to develop some community. I think the single player game rocks big time. It's already kept me busy for over 20+ hours. It's beautiful to play, its got an interesting character development system (albeit limited to 4 specialisations, melee, ranged, combat and nature magic), its much more a immersive world "graphics wise" than Diablo II. It falls down on a number of issues, but I don't think they as a whole warrant total dismissal.
The Multiplayer is poor, in terms of arranging, joining and connecting to online games - the lack of save ability in the multiplayer world - your character and its stats are saved, just the state of the areas you've sweeped through isn't. This is no worse than PSO. You log on, you face the forest monsters again, if you want.
The single player game gives you too much too soon. In an hour or two you can have a fully functioning party of 4 or 5 characters - and if you specialise correctly they can pretty much hold their own in most combat situations - setting the combat AI on the characters can leave you without much to do. Point them in the right direction and they'll do their respective jobs and hopefully you'll win. However, if you experiment with the games development system, and come up with interesting party combinations - it can be a much more involving experience. Revealing more subtle ways to play it.
On the whole, DS is an engine for fantasy battles, and as such it does a wonderful job. I guess gamers shouldn't have to twiddle and tweak too much with the single player game to get a level of enjoyment out of it - but it is worth the effort - and its more about exploring the games dynamics - than following 'lead me by the hand' story.
Basically, dismissing it on a few problems with multiplayer and its inherent clickety-click wave after wave battling mechanism is a bit unfair - at such an early stage in the products development.
Perhaps your money won't have been wasted when the modding community gets some decent player built add-ons together? Even without the editor, there are mods emerging day by day that address gold and inventory limitations - and I saw a post on how to convert the multiplayer game to a single player game that can then have its progress saved, and converted back when you want to play it.
I too am hoping for a patch to address the multiplayer problems - but as a single player game I think its just what us Action RPG'ers wanted. And I think my moneys been well spent on just the 20 hours I've played it. And I plan to play it a whole lot more.
I think DS has given action RPG'ers an engine to play out their fantasies. It's only been out over here a couple of days. Give it time to develop some community. I think the single player game rocks big time. It's already kept me busy for over 20+ hours. It's beautiful to play, its got an interesting character development system (albeit limited to 4 specialisations, melee, ranged, combat and nature magic), its much more a immersive world "graphics wise" than Diablo II. It falls down on a number of issues, but I don't think they as a whole warrant total dismissal.
The Multiplayer is poor, in terms of arranging, joining and connecting to online games - the lack of save ability in the multiplayer world - your character and its stats are saved, just the state of the areas you've sweeped through isn't. This is no worse than PSO. You log on, you face the forest monsters again, if you want.
The single player game gives you too much too soon. In an hour or two you can have a fully functioning party of 4 or 5 characters - and if you specialise correctly they can pretty much hold their own in most combat situations - setting the combat AI on the characters can leave you without much to do. Point them in the right direction and they'll do their respective jobs and hopefully you'll win. However, if you experiment with the games development system, and come up with interesting party combinations - it can be a much more involving experience. Revealing more subtle ways to play it.
On the whole, DS is an engine for fantasy battles, and as such it does a wonderful job. I guess gamers shouldn't have to twiddle and tweak too much with the single player game to get a level of enjoyment out of it - but it is worth the effort - and its more about exploring the games dynamics - than following 'lead me by the hand' story.
Basically, dismissing it on a few problems with multiplayer and its inherent clickety-click wave after wave battling mechanism is a bit unfair - at such an early stage in the products development.
Perhaps your money won't have been wasted when the modding community gets some decent player built add-ons together? Even without the editor, there are mods emerging day by day that address gold and inventory limitations - and I saw a post on how to convert the multiplayer game to a single player game that can then have its progress saved, and converted back when you want to play it.
I too am hoping for a patch to address the multiplayer problems - but as a single player game I think its just what us Action RPG'ers wanted. And I think my moneys been well spent on just the 20 hours I've played it. And I plan to play it a whole lot more.
Saturday, 16 March 2002
Beer and Boats
Well a night of pizza, beer and Jay and Silent Bob Strikes Back led to a good session on Pirates! Legend of the Black Kat. When I say good session I mean only the two player aspect supported in 'Sea Battles' mode. The game supports Quick Battle, where one player goes head to head with either the CPU or another player, and Fleet Battle where one player goes against a fleet of CPU ships in a sort of 'survival' mode.
After copious beer, the head to head battles with your tanked up adversary can get very loud and hectic. You can select which ship type you would like to command and the arena/watery landscape you would like to battle in. The landscape can range from fairly sparse flat pieces of greeny blue ocean to iceberg infested arctic wastelands. The land masses in Sea Battles can be both a hindrance and a tool for tactical play. As you tack to and fro trying to gain optimum placement to let your barrage of cannons rip into the soft belly of your opponent, these shards of ice can give you a taste of what the titanic went through, running you aground and leaving you vulnerable to a swift return attack, whilst you slam the rudder hard right to dislodge youself. The land masses can be used to stall the frantic cannonade, allowing you to take stock, repairing your bough and sails. With a bit of luck, you'll lure the enemy boat into pursuing you around a craggy island and as he makes that vulnerable turn you can open the sails and catch a gust of wind to come around his broadside and hit him hard and quickly escape the return fire, catching the wind again. Obviously using the landscape in this way leads to cries of "cowardice!" and other insults against your families level of honour. Maybe you fire one or two cheesey wotsits over to your opponents duel shock and catch him in the face leaving an orange reminder that if he "offends your family he offends your shaolin temple"...
The ships available range from really small one gun wonders to huge over gunned galleons. The impressive "GUNBOAT" having a single front-mounted gun, which gives rise to an impressive game of boat-based 'chicken'. The best games where the "even matches" where both opponents had the same boat. Having said that, theres nothing more hilarious than a two cannon "BUSS" going up against a 10 cannon "GALLEON", a real David and Goliath battle that has been decided before you start to play. Makes for interesting cat and mouse chases. The "MANOWAR" battles where a sight to behold, these massive battling stations turn slowly and take a lot of punishment and the sheer fire power can be stunning. The camera in Sea Battle mode remains independent of either player, however it zooms in and out depending on how close the two battling boats are together. So you can always see both players, but they will be small zoomed out representatives if you are having a long distance stand off. When the boats make a close pass, the camera zooms right in so you can see the burning sails and wood fragments explode from your deck.
There are floating box powerups thrown in every now and then to keep the battle lively, it takes real skill to race your ship to the box, avoiding collision with the other boat, sweeping up the goodie and getting away without too much damage. They provide a focal point for the two players to converge to - because one or the other usually has to make themselves prone, buy "telegraphing" their current course to the other player for the sake of the powerup. Powerups generally come in the form of a different masthead which affords you different attacks. One a rams head, allowing more successful ramming of the other ship (although ramming seemed to be a very costly thing to do regardless of masthead - sometimes the rammer would take more damage than the rammed), another was a dragons head, giving you a fire-based special that lights up your opponent with a warm glow that you want to toast your marshmallows on. Some powerups are used to block the attacks your opponent can make - and when you use them you halt any specials and disable their ability to catch the gust of wind - so you can plan carefully when to use these - as you sail into combat - disable the enemies attack and escape capabilities and hit hard and make your escape. These disabling powerups only have a limited time period of effect so it is important to get in, boom, boom, and out again. These hit and run tactics seem to be the best method for chiselling away your opponents hull integrity and tearing the sails into tatters. Prolonged side by side cannon pounding is impressive to watch but will decide the winner on who can get more off quicker rather than who can tactically maneuver and strike at the same time.
All in all, it is an excellent addition to the basic single player game. Even though I was wary of using the different ships in Battle for fear of reducing the ship building aspect to the single player game, I think the battles are isolated enough to just make you want to get your hands on enough money to upgrade to that "MANOWAR" rather than spoil anything. Very good post pub action, a few chugs on some grog before going into battle can help the fluidity of your turn and hopefully not affect the timing of your broadside special attacks. If all else fails you can always bombard your rival with cheesy wotsits and set course for ramming speed.
After copious beer, the head to head battles with your tanked up adversary can get very loud and hectic. You can select which ship type you would like to command and the arena/watery landscape you would like to battle in. The landscape can range from fairly sparse flat pieces of greeny blue ocean to iceberg infested arctic wastelands. The land masses in Sea Battles can be both a hindrance and a tool for tactical play. As you tack to and fro trying to gain optimum placement to let your barrage of cannons rip into the soft belly of your opponent, these shards of ice can give you a taste of what the titanic went through, running you aground and leaving you vulnerable to a swift return attack, whilst you slam the rudder hard right to dislodge youself. The land masses can be used to stall the frantic cannonade, allowing you to take stock, repairing your bough and sails. With a bit of luck, you'll lure the enemy boat into pursuing you around a craggy island and as he makes that vulnerable turn you can open the sails and catch a gust of wind to come around his broadside and hit him hard and quickly escape the return fire, catching the wind again. Obviously using the landscape in this way leads to cries of "cowardice!" and other insults against your families level of honour. Maybe you fire one or two cheesey wotsits over to your opponents duel shock and catch him in the face leaving an orange reminder that if he "offends your family he offends your shaolin temple"...
The ships available range from really small one gun wonders to huge over gunned galleons. The impressive "GUNBOAT" having a single front-mounted gun, which gives rise to an impressive game of boat-based 'chicken'. The best games where the "even matches" where both opponents had the same boat. Having said that, theres nothing more hilarious than a two cannon "BUSS" going up against a 10 cannon "GALLEON", a real David and Goliath battle that has been decided before you start to play. Makes for interesting cat and mouse chases. The "MANOWAR" battles where a sight to behold, these massive battling stations turn slowly and take a lot of punishment and the sheer fire power can be stunning. The camera in Sea Battle mode remains independent of either player, however it zooms in and out depending on how close the two battling boats are together. So you can always see both players, but they will be small zoomed out representatives if you are having a long distance stand off. When the boats make a close pass, the camera zooms right in so you can see the burning sails and wood fragments explode from your deck.
There are floating box powerups thrown in every now and then to keep the battle lively, it takes real skill to race your ship to the box, avoiding collision with the other boat, sweeping up the goodie and getting away without too much damage. They provide a focal point for the two players to converge to - because one or the other usually has to make themselves prone, buy "telegraphing" their current course to the other player for the sake of the powerup. Powerups generally come in the form of a different masthead which affords you different attacks. One a rams head, allowing more successful ramming of the other ship (although ramming seemed to be a very costly thing to do regardless of masthead - sometimes the rammer would take more damage than the rammed), another was a dragons head, giving you a fire-based special that lights up your opponent with a warm glow that you want to toast your marshmallows on. Some powerups are used to block the attacks your opponent can make - and when you use them you halt any specials and disable their ability to catch the gust of wind - so you can plan carefully when to use these - as you sail into combat - disable the enemies attack and escape capabilities and hit hard and make your escape. These disabling powerups only have a limited time period of effect so it is important to get in, boom, boom, and out again. These hit and run tactics seem to be the best method for chiselling away your opponents hull integrity and tearing the sails into tatters. Prolonged side by side cannon pounding is impressive to watch but will decide the winner on who can get more off quicker rather than who can tactically maneuver and strike at the same time.
All in all, it is an excellent addition to the basic single player game. Even though I was wary of using the different ships in Battle for fear of reducing the ship building aspect to the single player game, I think the battles are isolated enough to just make you want to get your hands on enough money to upgrade to that "MANOWAR" rather than spoil anything. Very good post pub action, a few chugs on some grog before going into battle can help the fluidity of your turn and hopefully not affect the timing of your broadside special attacks. If all else fails you can always bombard your rival with cheesy wotsits and set course for ramming speed.
Monday, 11 March 2002
Gaming TV Shows
TV Gaming shows... why do we have to have presenters with attitude anyway? From what little I've seen of Bits and Thumb Bandits, I prefer the cleaner format of Cybernet. If they could only get a voice presenter and some writers with a bit more gaming nouse, I reckon just watching the game is enough. If you buy a gaming mag, you read the review and furtively glance at the screenies (you're never looking for the chump that wrote it), if you go to a gaming web site, you download the movie whilst skipping through the textual dross, if you happen to be lucky enough to have a video or better yeta DVD strapped to the magazine you slap them in or on and watch the game in action. In fact the more you keep the reviewer away from the actual game the better. Let them throw in points of balance, let them have their opinion - but at the end of the day the snippets I see of the game itself is the thing that will sway me one way or another.
Reading a strategy gamer review is a scarey thing, a) because its strategy but b) because all the reviewers look like c**ts. Don't show me their faces when I read their dribble! Don't make me listen to "wacky and racey" birds pretending to know stuff about the games, if I want to watch birds I put on old re-runs of Baywatch. I want to watch the friggin games, I want more footage less banal shite and competitions. Even cybernet cuts the footage up with an overused piece of cgi showing a TV-headed robot FFS! I don't think the "scene" around gaming can be marketed as a cool "extreme sports" type thing. Not yet anyway. Most gamers are fat bespectacled teens or ageing men. Most work in IT, or are studying IT and most wouldn't dream of slipping into a ski suit and risking life and limb to pull off a 360 degree 'twisty misty'. Fat pizza and beer loving criminals.
Reading a strategy gamer review is a scarey thing, a) because its strategy but b) because all the reviewers look like c**ts. Don't show me their faces when I read their dribble! Don't make me listen to "wacky and racey" birds pretending to know stuff about the games, if I want to watch birds I put on old re-runs of Baywatch. I want to watch the friggin games, I want more footage less banal shite and competitions. Even cybernet cuts the footage up with an overused piece of cgi showing a TV-headed robot FFS! I don't think the "scene" around gaming can be marketed as a cool "extreme sports" type thing. Not yet anyway. Most gamers are fat bespectacled teens or ageing men. Most work in IT, or are studying IT and most wouldn't dream of slipping into a ski suit and risking life and limb to pull off a 360 degree 'twisty misty'. Fat pizza and beer loving criminals.
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